3 Key Lifestyle Habits to Upgrade Your Life
“Follow your bliss and don’t be afraid, and doors will open where you didn’t know they were going to be. – Joseph Campbell, famous mythologist”
For me, it is about people’s capacity to change the way they think and to therefore make great changes in their lives, because we truly create our world in our minds first. I have a science background and my previous career was in medical/healthcare communications. I am, therefore, somebody who likes to understand the mechanisms behind things. Reading the research into neuroplasticity (the brain’s ability to change itself), studying applied neuroscience and psychology lights me up because it proves to me that the structure of our brains is not ‘hardwired’, but that the development of our neural pathways can actively be changed by us. That is amazing! We are fully in control of our minds and, therefore, our behaviours and our lives! This is why coaching works so well and why it’s such a rewarding vocation. I know what it feels like to take control and transform your life because I have done it myself. I am living proof that it CAN be done. To be able to pass this on to others and to know that it works fills me with a sense of passion and purpose.
CB: Follow your Bliss & Face the Fear – two concepts that you integrated into your coaching practice. Let’s take each of them briefly and see how they support people in their daily struggles.
Following your bliss is about going after what calls to you in life, rather than what others tell you that you ‘should’ do. If we follow our bliss, we bring about positive changes in our lives that we never could have imagined before. It’s about doing what you were made to do and a concept that I work with in my coaching sessions with clients – helping them unlock what they are passionate about and what brings them joy. There is a great documentary about Joseph Campbell’s philosophy on following your bliss, called ‘Finding Joe’, that I would recommend highly.
Of course, in the path of following our bliss, one thing that can set us back and give us doubts is our fear. This is where the second concept comes in – of facing our fears in order to get the life that is meant for us. This is summed up in the phrase by Susan Jeffers, author of the book by the same name, “Feel the fear and do it anyway®”. A great attitude to live with, as we know that fear is not going to go away, in fact, it’s an important self-preservation mechanism, but it doesn’t have to stop us in our tracks. I taught workshops as a Licenced Trainer for the Susan Jeffers Organisation for many years and constantly learn so much about how facing fear and stepping out of our comfort zone helps us to grow. Whilst I generally have a supportive and a listening coaching style, I do challenge clients to step up and stretch themselves to achieve things they previously didn’t think possible – and always with great results.
I truly believe that people are AMAZING and capable of great things – particularly given the support and accountability a coach can provide. Bearing in mind these two concepts, almost as mantras, can be hugely beneficial and help guide your decisions on a daily basis. You can ask yourself if what you are considering will bring you more bliss or if you are just doing something because you feel you ‘should’. Then, when fears inevitably arise, it is important to recognise them as just fears and to remind yourself do something that scares you a little every day in order to grow as a person.
CB: What coaching methods do you use to support people having a fulfilled, mindful and joyful life?
I am very lucky that I have many different areas to be able to draw on here from my training and experience – including psychology, coaching theory and practice, neuroscience, Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), mindfulness training and even yoga, martial arts and breathwork. There is such a broad range of tools available to support people in having a fulfilled, mindful and joyful life that it would take forever to list them all, but I have suggested my top three most effective habit changes below.
CB: What are your top 3 Lifestyle Habits that you encourage people to develop, in order to live holistically, in line with their values and mission?
1. ‘Know yourself and be yourself – embrace your uniqueness’ – learn about what makes you tick and then accept all parts of yourself. You are unique and have strengths that nobody else has. Comparing yourself to others is a recipe for disaster. Louise Hays’ ‘mirror work’ is a great tool for self-acceptance and learning to love everything you are. Write your mission and learn to recognise your value, so that you can behave in a way that is in alignment with these.
2. ‘Choose an attitude of gratitude’, as this will bring more things into your life to be grateful for. Make a conscious choice to choose the way you want to feel every morning when you wake. Start a gratitude diary right now – just 3 things every morning that you are thankful for. Then watch your life change! Gratitude is like an antidote to our problems. It’s not about feeling grateful once we have what we think we want, but instead choosing to be grateful for all that we have right now.
3. ‘Be present and live in this moment’. The past is gone and cannot be changed. The future does not exist, so it would be crazy to worry about something that may never happen. The only time we really have is right now and it’s the only time when we can affect change in our lives. Really be here, physically, mentally and emotionally. Value every moment and also realise that being present with somebody, giving them your full attention in the here and now, is one of the most powerful and caring things you can do.
