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Here at the-Coaching Blog-run by Gerard O’Donovan, our aim is to constantly bring value to those seeking to improve their lives. Therefore we have a policy of publishing articles and materials by guest authors whom we value and appreciate. Today’s guest author is Samantha Krajina (Australia).
Ideally, when women think of romance, they think of the knight in shining armor bearing roses and chocolates. When you think about it, it is a very high expectation set of men and an immense pressure to get it right. When men think of romance, they think of escaping from the ordinary and focusing on the passion between them.
However, romance need not be the sole responsibility of the man in the relationship but is ultimately the responsibility of both. Nor should it feel like a burden or an unrewarded effort to put romance on the priority list in a relationship.
All relationships rely on intimacy and romance to keep it alive and prevent falling into the routine of solely day-to-day living. Very few couples find it difficult sharing romantic experiences with their partner early on in the relationship, however as time goes on, the energy and creative ideas tend to wear thin and can be discouraging. So, how do we recreate that honeymoon young love that sparked the connection with our partner? How can we inject romance and excitement into a comfortable relationship?
The good news is that relationships are not a result, nor are they an event where what you have created is the end product. With a little love and attention, it is an evolving organism where it can continue to grow and be fulfilling.
Love is constant; Passion needs recharging!
To start off with, think about all of the excuses you can come up with as to why it may be too much effort, and all of the reasons why you do not think it will work in your relationship. Maybe you are too busy with work, the kids have sport and school commitments, or you just can’t find the time… Great, now jump in your partner’s shoes and have a look. From a glance, how important are those barriers and how significant are the excuses?
Now that you have kicked those excuses to the curb, let’s have a look at how easy it is to recreate romance into your relationship. I want you to ask yourself one simple question “What can I do to make my partner feel special?”
When your partner is happy because of something you did, how does it make you feel? Do you really know what makes them the happiest, and when was the last time you went out of your way to make them feel that way? Think about that special something they love – may it be an experience, a product, an event, a place… whatever it may be, find a creative way to show them that you know what they like and you can put your preferences aside to please them.
Especially for women, when she feels that her man has actually listened to her and taken notice of the things she loves or loves to do, and initiates it himself is extremely attractive and surprisingly pleasing. It is no different for men, either. When we want to romance our partner, it is extremely important to know what they like, as it is not always the same as what we would like. All of those little things that mean so much to us as women, that our men don’t always notice or understand their value, are because the things that mean a lot to them can be quite different. Ladies, don’t be surprised or resist the reality that his ideal romantic situation is you presenting him with his favorite food, beer and an exciting little glimpse of lingerie peeking out of your blouse with a cheeky look in your eye. Remember, your partner finds you very sexy – if you let go of any insecurity and embrace that beautiful sexy thing that you are, you will be irresistible to them!
Nothing is sexier than confidence and adventure!
We all know that wonderful feeling when someone has put in the effort to make us feel special. It is exciting, flattering and creates a rippling effect where we want to return the favor. This is a great habit to get into and can become very rewarding.
Many people tend to think that communicating romantic desires with their partner eliminates the excitement and the element of surprise, where it can actually be quite the opposite. Rather than hinting (which very seldom converts), tell your partner what you would like, and allow them to do it in their own way. It takes a lot of the guessing work out of the equation and gives them more of an incentive and will to perform it.
Go ahead and romance your partner leaving them to desire you more than ever, and allow them to romance you in return!
Samantha Krajina (Australia)
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